Crazy

11:29 a.m.

I was talking to some guys in my strength training course who were telling me all the things my partner said about me after class yesterday - the one where I, you know, collapsed. I'm just going to paraphrase it here so you get the gist:

"That little runt was crazy from the first day I met him. He tries like hell, yeah, but he can't keep up with everybody and he knows it. I've seen him get pissed off and do some stuff I didn't think he could, but that's the first time I've seen somebody get so pissed off that they actually passed out. He's crazy."

I would be more upset at this if not for the fact that I don't care what my partner thinks of me. Besides, it's true. I'm fucking crazy, fuckers.

That said, I was getting even more pissed off today because I can feel everybody watching me out of the corner of their eye, seeing if we get a repeat of yesterday's spectacular performance. I don't mind being the center of attention but nobody enjoys feeling like the nickel freak show at the circus.

And She-Hulk wouldn't let me do anything. Every time I tried to add more weights she'd take them off and tell me to go again with what I had. Watching me like a ginormous hawk, that woman is. Goddammit. Tomorrow I'm going to come in wearing a Mexican wrestler's mask and proclaim that I will break anyone in that class that attempts to mess with El LeeboZeebo LOCO....like so, with my knee.

Let them talk about that.

I realize, however, that all this talk probably freaks out more people than I'm intending. Yes, I'm giving it to myself hardcore, but I'm not an idiot. I'm not going to cause myself serious injury if I can help it.

Still, I was remembering earlier today what life was like before I started lifting weights. I can remember when my hands weren't covered in these rough callouses and blisters. I can remember when I wasn't hungry all the fucking time. I can remember when looking at the scale and seeing that I'd gained a bunch of weight meant that I needed to cut back on sugar sodas. I can remember when I wasn't waking up every single morning with a new kind of unbearable pain that makes me have to roll out of bed, as opposed to climbing out.

Those were some good times.

But then again I can also remember when the concept of bench pressing mostly meant sitting on one. Or when preacher curls were best left to men of the cloth. The pros and cons are kind of even, I guess.

Still, I would like it if I could do something without groaning like an old man.

Listening To: Lipps Inc. - Funky Town, Wang Chung - Everybody Have Fun Tonight

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